Different or plain weird

          Feeling weirdly out of place yet in the zone.

No, I'm not talking about switching your mood to fit the scenario. Neither am I talking about trying to blend in.

Ever since I was young, I never had much friends around. It was hard, as a girl. I grew up learning that I had to do certain things because I am a girl, and that I should sit with my legs together and chew with my mouth closed. But why?

I grew up to learn that I am contradicting. 

Manners to me, yes it's courtesy, but why should I let someone step all over me just because they want to or just because they feel superior over me?

I like talking to people, knowing about their stories and what they've gone through, yet at the same time; what does it have to do with me again? But it's just me..

I tend to doubt my own character. I've never felt in place and neither have I felt out of place. 

It was never a switch of mood or mindset just to play-along or blend into my environment with a certain group of people. It's just me.

I never liked people who disrespect another for no particular reason and I try to not disrespect certain people too. But I just do, why? 

I never liked taking sides in an argument between 2 person, but why do I love it when someone takes my side in an argument?

I love food, I go for buffets, I go to restaurants and diners and I love how they're made and how they taste, but isn't it a chore to eat?

I like meeting new people, making new friends and expanding my network to better myself, and yet I hate small talks.

Why? - Is a question I always ask myself.

Am I different, or plain weird?